SOS (SomeOneShootme)

How the hell are you supposed to believe,trust and love someone who's lied to you all your life?

Teen angst, He wants to get laid????

So me and the BF had a fight , it was stupid. It was because I couldn't come over to day. Although im pretty sure he thought that if i went to his place we would, you know......
It's like do really want me over there just because you think I'm going to shag you???
I didn't tell him that of course, because i don't think i'd really mind much my only issue is me being so gross and fat and ugly.
I broke my own personal record  i was mad at him for almost more than 18 hours, pathetic right? Right.




Mia is begginning to haunt me again, its so strange to feel it just as they beggin to give me more freedom.
Not exsactly freedom per say just less therapy and actually being allowed in other rooms that aren't occupied by other people. The shackles are being loosened.


I feel almost to restless to even be contained in my own body, I just wanna do something outrageous, go somewhere,do something! I'm not totally sure what I want. It could just be teen angst talking...or Mia I'm not sure which is which sometimes


Random question what would you ladies say is the biggest turn on ever for you???
All awkwardness aside I'd deffinetly say when he nip/kisses my cheeks and won't let me go

The suitors

Hey "baby"
Hey "honey"
Hey "darling"
guess what?
I am not your damn property
not something
you can
pick up
whenever
and cuddle
like a little bear
I bite
I kick

I am waiting for him
my love
You know that
your stronger than me
the other
will not
stop
trying
to talk to me

if I
let you go
do not pick up
never reply
I am buisey
or i don't want to talk
not
mean
or cruel
both sweet
with
a secret
a secret blade
intensions
running
i see
not so innocent
my only intension
is to just wait for him.

FaceBook Ana Mia groups

This post will end up somewhere between biast as heck and a rant, I'm 98% sure I was jsut kicked off the pro-ana/mia face book group I was apart of. Did I offend someone? I have no clue. If I did I have no clue what I said that could have been offensive, I do not know if Facebook has the power to shut down said groups but needless to say people have been kicked out before. If you are not part of a Facebook groups there are plusses and neggative things, lots of debates that get really intense (which means one comment and you will be spammed for life). It is however, a great way to share progress pics,blogs,links and find other ana/mia's. I'm almost certain that at soem point the human affect kicks in and some people forget that it's not about anything but the goal (whatever yours may be).

In other knews my forced 'recover' is going desently. I feel like one of those tinny plush backpacks the ones of like a horse or a dog that has a loopy-thing so you can hang it by it's neck?
Thats me. Hanging by my neck.
My heart has gone up and my weight is "stable" I haven't been weighed in almost a month so I'm very very afraid of what that's gonna look like. I'm aiming for musceles but that still doesn't stop the old habits . The doctors and therapist and parents of the world just need to come and realize that no matter how hard they try Mia is apart of me and they cannot fix me, there is nothing to fix. A good friend of mine was anorexic, granted she still goes without food when she feels like it. She does anything when she feels like it.
Me and the boy are still an item <3 don't hate me but I'm relly super into him and he's super into me. I just don't have a lot of time for a realationship but i really really want to keep him!!!
Living two hours away and having a crazy schedule doesn't help. Ok honestly is there like, a guide book to making out and the differnet 'bases'!?!? because I feel like both of us never go the memo!

He's getting me a present for Valentines Day and I might not competely hate on the holiday for once in my life. We'll see. Song- Lykke Li - Tonight