Wednesday, April 4, 2012

The Cycle of Bulimia

Sicentists  and doctors alway call it a cycle of binging and purging but to me its a lot more than just binging and purging. Initially I would say that i would have been more closely associated with anorexia because at the hight of my ED i was excersizing 3-4 hours a day and mainting 3,4,5,8 hundred calories if even that
i was almost at 100 pounds...sigh the memories of being on top of the world and not feeling you were gonna squash it.

I'm really actually quite frantic because I feel like 'recovery' has broken my cycle in a very bad way, i don't purge but i BING AND BING AND BING.
I can'r consentrate ,sleep anything its crazy




List of things im too scared/ to do w/ confidence

Sex- um ya too fat its a major ew

dancing- i dance but its hard,i feel like a hipo

tight clothes- well duh its a no

just walking around

being touched- anywhere a hug a tap anything

eating in public-im scared,id rather eat in a stall


im fat im ugly im usless i want to die

2 comments:

  1. I agree I actually was anorexic I would eat about three bites of cereal a day and weighed 100lbs and lower in the height of my eating disorder but on days when I felt fat like a few times a month I would puke up the three bites of cereal and that was enough to get me classified as bulimic, While it's disgusting and most other girl like me don't want that classification because being called anoretic is soooo much better the bright side is when they make you recover you don't have to gain as much back :/

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  2. they actually are ok with me loosing weight because even they think i could! just their slow way -____- id prefer the title anorexia over bulimia ,tho one is not much better than the other

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