Mean Girl to Princess

I am mean . Its just that simple:i'm really very mean . I have one of those faces that can be sweet and clueless  and eyes that admire every word you utter or make you want to take a step back and surrender,my eyes could melt your skin if you piss me off just right .Or if i feel like being mean .I'm really mean to my family,i know this because i spend all day trying to keep from exploding on everyone i know .I smile,i laugh i complement people the works y'know ? and then by the time i'm home i explode-close to literally- i know i have to be nicer and i'm ruining my relationship with my family . They scare me though . I don't like being around them most of the time because i am their black cat, rotten moods emerge and phone calls that my parents dread come in soon everyones screaming and arguing and i leave .I've been raised to know that God id a king and my father who knows me personally . If i'm his daughter i have to act like a princess .Now keep in mind that i don't know how i feel about religion yet i've been raised strickly where religion is forced appon me and i could never leave my church till i'm 18 because my parents would never allow it . But my sister and mom and i had this big explotion and i told them they scare me,that i hate our home and that i'm going to try harder,we all are i think . I'm going to be my best princess .